Mind over matter: Lindsey’s marathon journey for Mind

E.ON is proud to support our people, both professionally and also on a personal level when colleagues need additional support. Through our policies, practices and partners, we’re keen to enable our colleagues to thrive, and that includes through our work with our charity partner, Mind.

To amplify the impact of colleague contributions, E.ON match funds donations to Mind, effectively doubling the support and helping even more people access the mental health resources they need.

One of our colleagues, Lindsey McKinnon, Smart Compliance Lead in Net Zero Delivery, is preparing to run the London Marathon on 27^th April in support of Mind. Lindsey shares her journey, her motivations, and the significance of this challenge in her own words below:

Lindsey’s story

Hey, I’m Lindsey! I’m from Glasgow and I’ve worked at E.ON for coming up to four years. I started here working in Digital Technology as a Security Analyst, but I’m currently on secondment in E.ON Next as a Smart Compliance Lead in the Net Zero Obligations Governance team. 

Fun fact about me: I wouldn’t call myself a runner at all, but I somehow love to sign up to races. I’ve done a few 10ks and half marathons over the last few years, but outside of the build up to those, I don’t run at all!

Why Mind?

I’ve always said I would never run a marathon, unless it was London. I’ve been applying for 10 years and couldn’t believe that I was able to secure a charity place this year. I’m exceptionally fortunate that Mind is my chosen charity already, so the fact they are our charity partner makes it even more exciting to get to fundraise for them.

Mental health is something I’ve struggled with throughout my life, and for a lot of it I didn’t even realise feeling like that wasn’t the norm.

Those close to me will know me as positive, fun, outgoing and independent. So, in 2019, when I realised I was no longer any of those things anymore, except from too independent to lean on anyone else for help, I knew something was wrong.

I was in the middle of my master’s degree, working a job I loved, had a great group of friends around me - I had no reason to be depressed, so it couldn’t possibly be depression. Right? It creeps up on you really slowly, so slowly that you don’t realise it’s there until it really is. I never realised poor mental health can cause physical symptoms. So, when I started sleeping 20+ hours a day (not through choice), it became evident something was really wrong. I would put it down to being stressed from university, or blame myself for being lazy, but the longer it went on the more shut off and angry at myself I became. I had no reason to be like this, and yet it felt like my body was shutting down and I was trapped inside.

I like to deal with issues by myself, I don’t want to bother others or make them worry. I was at the stage where getting better no longer felt like an option and that it was only going to get worse. At this point I’m a few months into extreme fatigue, I’ve shut myself off from a lot of my friends and I’ve accepted that there isn’t much more left ahead for me. I had been looking online at my symptoms and trying to see any glimmer of hope, even though I was convinced that this was it, we were done.

Then I came across Mind’s page, and I found their A-Z of mental health and saw all my symptoms right there alongside depression. I don’t know what it was that got me to pick up the phone to the doctors, but I think had I not seen that these symptoms weren’t uncommon, I wouldn’t have.

I remember going to the doctors about it for the first time, not really knowing what I was going to say or why I was really going. How does the conversation even go? Do you tell them you don’t want to be here but don’t want them to think you’re just being dramatic?

I sat down with the doctor and just cried. And cried. And cried. The more I explained my situation, the more I realised how bad things had actually got. We talked through my symptoms, my feelings and maybe where it had all stemmed from. We discussed medication and therapy, and further services available. I still to this day am on the therapy waiting list and have never heard from them, even five years later.

I slowly climbed my way back to a manageable state. I was able to complete my degree and rekindled the relationships that had become strained during my illness. I was lucky – other stories don’t end like mine. That’s why we need organisations like Mind. They provide resources to educate not only those facing struggles, but for anyone who may know someone who is struggling. Mind are creating space to talk about issues people are facing and to make it known that it's ok to talk about it and get help. They have crisis resources for those who need help immediately and knowing how close I got, we need to continue to help them to save others.

Organisations like Mind are essential because they provide vital resources for those struggling, as well as helping to educate others and break the stigma around mental health issues and I could not be prouder doing this for them. This run for me is a way to raise awareness for an incredible charity, mark a closing chapter and be a victory run to prove to myself that I’ve made it out - not only alive, but stronger.

Training for the big day

One thing I didn’t consider was that a spring marathon means winter training. And in the height of a Scottish winter that is rough! I’m following a running plan which has me running four times a week and to keep it fun I like to treat myself to a day trip on my long run day. Somewhere exciting or new, and often ending at a café for a coffee and a sweet treat (or the pub). I’m very fortunate that I'm local to some pretty cool places, for my first 10 mile run I went and ran round Great Cumbrae Island, as it’s a perfect 10-mile loop.

Goal-wise, it’s just to get to the end and have enjoyed it! Whilst I’d love certain times, I don’t want anything to take away the accomplishment of just making it this far (plus I’ll be singing, dancing and crying the whole way so not sure that’s a recipe for a quick time!) I know that every penny raised is going towards an amazing cause, and my hope is that challenges like this continue to raise awareness for the incredible work that Mind does and maybe even inspire others to take on their own challenges!

Support is there when you need it

Lindsey’s journey is a testament to resilience, determination, and the importance of mental health awareness.

With one in four people experiencing a mental health problem each year, charities like Mind are a vital step in making a difference, and we’re proud to support every step of the way.